


Ugh Hetros {Discontinued}

by Alex_Is_Trash_16 (orphan_account)



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz, Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Au - No Squip, Be LESS Chill, F/F, F/M, Jeremy Still can’t drink Mtn Dew, M/M, Operation Find the Gay, another group chat fic, this is sin
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-07
Updated: 2017-12-10
Packaged: 2019-01-30 19:20:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 1,514
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12659793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/Alex_Is_Trash_16
Summary: Another Group Chat FicWhy must I do this





	1. Group Of Gays

**Author's Note:**

> Mellon- Michael Mell  
> LUSH- Jared Kleinman  
> Jeremy Wants To Die- Jeremy Heere  
> Tree Hugger - Evan Hansen

_mellon has added Jeremy Wants To Die, LUSH, and Tree Hugger to gays for Jesus_

Jeremy Wants to Die: Gays for Jesus, really Michael

_Mellon changed Chat name to Gays for Satan_

Mellon: is that better for you  _Jeremy_

Tree Hugger: This is why we get bullied guys 

LUSH: why does this exist Michael 

Mellon: because we are starting a GSA

Tree Hugger: 1st- No 2nd- Why

Mellon: We need to find more Gays in this mess 

Jeremy Wants to Die: I’ve found 5 

Mellon: who’s this 5th gay

Jeremy Wants to Die: the weird kid in the back of the Home Ect. Class 

Tree Hugger: that’s ironic 

LUSH: why

Tree Hugger: ummm Jared do you pay attention at any point during school

LUSH: the Bathbombs are destroying my brain, so no

mellon:*takes all of Jared’s Bathbombs*

Tree Hugger: well pay attention gays

mellon: no you’re not my mother 

 

 


	2. The 5th Gay

Tree Hugger: Well If you guys actually payed attention, he kinda hates the other  **4** gays 

Mellon: well we can make him kinda not hate the other four gays through the power of weed and GSA

Jeremy Wants To Die: "the power of weed and GSA" are you high Micheal

LUSH: First Micheal why are you so obsessed with A GSA

Mellon: BECAUSE WE ARE GAYS FOR SATAN

Tree Hugger: if we're gays for Satan Y'all need Jesus

LUSH: Evan, My buddy, Gays for Satan don't need Jesus

Jeremy Wants To Die: Are you (not you Evan) all high

LUSH: Yeah on the Drug of life my dude

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry its been awhile (school, Anxiety, ect.) I'll try to post more often ~ Alex


	3. Mountain Dew is not for you

Two Days Later

Mellon: So my fellow gays (and Bis) who's ready for the annual Mtn Dew Challenge

LUSH: Really Dude after what happened with Mr. Wants to Die last year

Jeremy Wants To Die: Jared, my dude, last years accident will not be repeated (we now know not to give me Mtn Dew)

Tree Hugger: ya know, I'm friends with the people here not the things they do

LUSH: Evan We Know You Love Us

Mellon: Let's not go overboard Heere 

_LUSH Has Added **BlackNailPolish** to GAYS FOR SATAN_

BlackNailPolish: What the hell is this 

Mellon: This is GAYS FOR SATAN a lovely group of people with a love of GSA'S and The Dark Lord Satan

Tree Hugger: We are not(all) in love with Satan

LUSH: Well random kid who stole my phone in the library, This was a group of normal gays and bisexuals until any of us existed 

Tree Hugger: You also, can't leave now I've tried

BlackNailPolish: Ummm, Okay you all are very strange Mother Fuckers and since I apparently can't leave and don't have friends I'm Connor

Mellon: Micheal Mell

Jeremy Wants to die: guess

LUSH: THE INSANELY COOL JARED KLIENMAN

Tree Hugger: Evan

BlackNailPolish: Ok, What the hell happened with mtn dew last year


	4. The Mtn Dew Incident

Mellon: So, In a bout of High Micheal Greatness on this day 2 years ago, I made me and Jared both drink as many bottles of mountain dew that is humanly possible in  5 minutes

Jeremy Wants To Die: Then, on this fine day Oct. 24 last year Micheal made me do the challenge, as we were both high then a kite at the time, we forgot I was ALLERGIC to MTN DEW and lets just say, The ER nurses @ 3 am were not happy to be dealing with a high 17 year old who was having a allergic reaction

Mellon: and we made Jared and Evan come to the hospital

LUSH: which is why Micheal will not be doing the MTN DEW challenge this year right 

Mellon: Ok meet me at the mall in 60 minutes

BlackNailPolish: which one

Jeremy Wants to Die: Freehold Mall, Its Micheal's favorite

BlackNailPolish: Ok gonna meet random people I barely know at a mall

LUSH: you're the one who joined

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll make the mall it's own chapter also, Freehold mall is the best one in New Jersey ~ Alex


	5. Freehold Mall of Gays(PART 1)

Jeremy's PoV 

"Why are we doing this, again?" 

"For Science and I want to see who we ship," 

"Micheal We ship Evan with trees and Jared with the LUSH store"

"Jeremy, My Buddy, ya see there is a function on this planet and Its pure purpose is for the Gays and Bi's to ship other Gays and Bi's, We leave heteros out of this"

"Micheal I want to Punch you right now"

" Jeremy, I'm Driving"

"And I'm Bi"

Micheal turns his shitty radio up as some Bob Marley song I wouldn't be able to tell you came on.

** A magical time skip to the mall brought to you by Connors Nail Polish **

"Well look who finally decided to show up," Jared yells from the line at Starbucks, Evan face palming beside him. Conner is sitting in a booth with a Double Chocolate Chip Creme. Well here goes nothing,

"Hi I'm Jeremy, from the group chat," 

" Hello Jeremy, do you know why Evan isn't talking to anyone?" He says it with a tone of sarcasm we never hear about Evan.

"Yeah Social Anxiety" I say trying to pretend that didn't just happen as Micheal practically throws Jared at me... Why must he do this

We walk to the elevator because screw escalators, and fit the entire group in. The 5 of us walk to Spencer's for Micheal's first challenge, Gay Shirts and Shit.    

 

 


	6. Mtn Dew (Me)

P“Hello everybody of the free hold raceway mall and welcome to the annual MTN DEW Challange,” Micheal says standing on a table while Jared trys to push him off. The Mountain Dew challange should really be the Mountian Dew Me challange.

”in which my Boyf will not include because life is Important”

”Add my on Snapchat at Jeremy wants to die”I say snickering to myself because shameless self promo, am I right. I look up to Connor chugging every bottle of Mountian Dew, he might actually beat Micheal at this a feet nobody has yet to pass. Evan is on his phone trying to pretend he’s not a part of this(as always and kinda starring Connor). I open up my Snapchat to see if anybody added me, surprisingly somebody did, It was probably Connor or some kid from school tho. 

Micheal throwing himself in my lap, dramatically yells, “I have been defeated, play Bob Marley at my funeral,” “Micheal you’re being over dramatic again,” “K theater Nerd” “K player 1” Micheal sits up when Connor sits back down, after he threw up in a fake tree because these things happen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This short event will end soon (happily) and regular programming will return- Alex


	7. Now Back to regular programming

**Private chat: LUSH AND TREE HUGGER**

LUSH: What was with you and Connor at the mall today

Tree Hugger: Nothing.... what are you talking about

LUSH: idk you staring at him non-stop 

Tree Hugger: was it that noticeable 

LUSH: Nope I was just paying attention 

Tree Hugger: ok... not gonna question this today, talk tomorrow 

**GAYS FOR SATAN CHAT**

Mellon: yo, blacknailpolish good job defeating me today

blacknailpolish: I still have no idea how that game worked

JeremeyIsHeere: Micheal is used to being the most useless gaymer and stoner but not he’s just one of those things

blacknailpolish: I still have no idea but ok

LUSH REMOVED TREE HUGGER

LUSH: so gays did anyone notice Our boy Evan staring at Our Boi Connor all day

blacknailpolish: I may have why

LUSH: because Connor this is operation Tree Bros aka operation get Connor and Evan together 

blacknailpolish: I did not agree to this 

LUSH: nobody asked for your opinion Connor

Mellon: what about operation GSA

LUSH: well, it starts with operation GSA

JeremyIsHeere: more like operation find the gay

Mellon Changed Chat name to:  **operation find the gay**

Mellon: I like the way you think Heere

JeremyIsHeere: I only stat the truth 

LUSH: let the fun begin

****

* * *

 

Guidance Office- Monday

”Micheal why should we make a GSA in our school,”

”Because we should have a place of support for young questioning LGBT Kids they don’t have to be scared to call or visit Ms.G,”

”Micheal submit your forms but, I can’t promise anything;”

* * *

 

Back to the Gayme - Alex

  


	8. Soooo, that bitch in guidance

Mellon: You gays know that bitch in guidance who’s in charge of Clubs and Sports and shit right

Tree Hugger: yeah we’ve been introduced 

blacknailpolish: she’s gotten me out of like 9 weeks worth of Detention 

Mellon: well she said the votes to get a gays only were unlikely or some gay shit 

JeremyIsHeere: how many to you need

Mellon: 10 and we have 5

Tree Hugger added a.Ham and Gay4turtles

a.Ham: now as any normal person, why am I being added to group chats during school hours

Mellon: We need 5 more votes for a club most people don’t want

A.Ham: then pay people to vote and then have the club open

Gay4turtles: or ya know just find more people, based on the group chat name, you want a GSA

A.Ham: Jack don’t be a good person here

Mellon: no good person is in Heere

JeremyIsHeere: are you calling yourself a bad person

A.Ham: anyway, who’s blacknailpolish

blacknailpolish: druggie Connor not popular connor

Tree Hugger: and if anyone else said that we’d all be in the er 

A.Ham: anyway Mr. Peterson is making me turn my phone off

 


End file.
